Being Me

A typical day standing by the lake.

A typical day standing by the lake.

I spend a ridiculous amount of time by myself.

I’m home alone most evenings right after work and it isn’t uncommon for me to go an entire day on the weekend without even seeing another person. Unless I need to go to the grocery store or decide to go to one of the busier parks to shoot photos it’s pretty easy to isolate myself at home.

It’s not as though I have no interaction at all. There’s Facebook, of course, with it’s false sense of community. I can stay up-to-date with everyone I know without ever actually talking to them or seeing them. It’s easy to get sucked in for hours, living vicariously through all of your friends and their various exploits.

Am I lonely?  Sometimes, I guess. But I generally don’t mind being alone. In fact, on some level, it’s a choice. There are a lot of things I could do. I could re-engage in the theater and photography communities. I could volunteer. But that all just sounds like a lot of effort right now.

Sometimes, I wonder “What’s wrong with me?” I used to be so outgoing and social. Now I avoid crowds. Just the thought of going out at night exhausts me. Then, I remember that just a few short months ago, I was a full-time caregiver and that it is going to take time to re-define who I am and how I live my life.

Patience has never been my strongest attribute.

I’ve also never been particularly good at living in the moment. I’ve spent a lot of my life chasing some idea of what I should be, some version of “success” that I’ve had in my brain.  I’m starting to realize that I’d be better served by taking cues from what’s going on around me in the moment.  Enjoy those moments, because they’re all we have.

I know that this year is going to be full of change for me.  Change is hard and scary, but it is necessary for growth. I am eager to see how the coming months unfold.

In the meantime, I guess it’s a good thing I enjoy my own company.

If I won the lottery

I hope that if I became rich I wouldn't become an asshole.

I hope that if I became rich I wouldn’t become an asshole.

People want to be rich for a variety of reasons.  In the end, however, I think the underlying reason for most of us is that we want to be free of the nine-to-five workaday life.  Though there are those among us lucky enough to have found a way to make a living doing what we love, most of us work to live, not the other way around.  We work to support the things we love.  That is certainly the case with me.

With the recent Mega Millions lotto that was over $600 million it got me thinking about what I’d do with that kind of money.

In terms of the “things” I’d get, below are a few of them, in no particular order.

I'm not a grease monkey, but I've always loved to drive, and I like classic cars.  I'd probably have a small collection of classic cars, like this 1963 Porsche 911- 357

I’m not a grease monkey, but I’ve always loved to drive, and I like classic cars. I’d probably have a small collection of classic cars, like this 1963 Porsche 911- 357

I love tropical locations and I love tree houses. I’d buy a place in Costa Rica or elsewhere in Central America and build a treehouse in a tree like this ficus. I’d probably spend all but the rainy season here.

I've always wanted to learn how to fly, and I especially enjoy flying in helicopters.  I'd get my heli license if I had unlimited funds.I’ve always wanted to learn how to fly, and I especially enjoy flying in helicopters. I’d get my heli license if I had unlimited funds.

I'd get season tickets to see the Seattle Seahawks.  Ok, this this one is pretty attainable even without the lotto...but if I won the lotto I'd probably get a box.  That way I could bring a bunch of friends to every game.

I’d get season tickets to see the Seattle Seahawks. Ok, this this one is pretty attainable even without the lotto…but if I won the lotto I’d probably get a box. That way I could bring a bunch of friends to every game.

I'd be able to afford the best lenses available that would allow me to shoot in all kinds of conditions.  I might finally have enough zoom to catch the bald eagle picture I've always wanted.

I’d be able to afford the best lenses available that would allow me to shoot in all kinds of conditions. I might finally have enough zoom to catch the bald eagle picture I’ve always wanted.

Of course, the things are only a small part of what I’d do with the money.  I’d invest some of it, and I’d find ways to give back.  At home I’d sponsor educational opportunities through scholarships and efforts to provide low-income children a chance to get an education.  There’s nothing worse than having the ability to do well in school, but to be denied the opportunity because your family can’t afford it.

Globally, there are so many causes that deserve support, it would just be a matter of choosing one (or several) and sponsoring those.  I’m especially enamored with charities that help people to help themselves by providing them a means to break the cycle of poverty.  Buying livestock or land for people who live a subsistence lifestyle is one example, but there are others to be sure.

I’d be a patron of the arts.  I believe that one of the things that defines us as human beings is our ability to create and appreciate art.  I appreciate all forms of art and would support as many different types of artists in their endeavors as possible.

I have no desire to have fancy clothes or to go to expensive hotels and exclusive clubs.  I’m a blue collar guy at heart.  I’d do some things for myself and my family, sure…but just think of the meaningful impact that much money could have on so many others.

What would you do if you won the lotto?  Would you want to rub elbows with the Kardashians, or roll up your sleeves and do something for others?  Leave a comment below, I’m interested to hear peoples’ thoughts.

The 12th Man

20140119-132134.jpgI’m ready to enjoy the NFC Championship between the Seattle Seahawks and the San Francisco 49ers. Go Hawks!!!

14/48: The World’s Quickest Theater Festival

1 <3 1448

The picture above says it.  I love 14/48!

What is 14/48, you may ask?  It’s a theater festival and one of my favorite things in the world.  I could never explain it better than they already have.  Here is a snippet from their website that explains the process:

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Early Thursday night:
After tapping the ceremonial 14/48 Keg, all the participants choose a theme by completing this sentence: “Theatre would be a lot more interesting if there were seven ten-minute plays about _____.” One answer is chosen at random and that becomes the theme for the following evening. Seven terrfied, excited, caffeinated writers must submit a brand new 10-minute play based on the theme by 8am Friday morning.

Friday morning:
Seven directors gather and each randomly draw one play. Thirty minutes later, the directors blindly choose actors and actresses’ names on slips of paper to cast the show.

That day:
The band shows up to provide music and sound, designers create all technical aspects of each show as the directors and their casts rehearse all day. Each play gets 20 minutes of tech rehearsal.

Friday evening:
The seven plays have their World Premiere at 8pm and Final Performance at 10:30pm. The 8pm audience provides the theme for Saturday’s show via a random drawing and the seven writers go home to start the process all over again to culminate with seven brand new scripts for Saturday evening at 8pm and 10:30pm, thus creating 14 plays in 48 hours.

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If you are a fan of theater, this is for you.  If you aren’t a fan of theater, this is DEFINITELY for you.  The stakes are high for all involved, and the audience is the beneficiary of that elevated level of adrenaline.   Many of the most powerful moments I’ve seen performed, period, have been onstage at 14/48.

I highly recommend that you pay a visit to their website.

I’m going to the 10:30 show tonight, and I can’t wait!